A Puppy Tale

    In a momentary lapse in sanity, Brandon and I decided to bring a baby into our home; a four- legged, curly-haired, scallywag of a pup with whom we have fallen absolutely and unequivocably in love.  In a move most controversial to our family members, we decided to call him Obama.  Our reasoning is very simple: First, like the new President, he's a cute little biracial boy, only in this case his mother was chocolate and it's dad who was cream-colored.  Second, we adopted him the day before the inauguration and we wanted to commemorate the occasion so we'd never forget when we got our first dog.  Third, like the President, we are confidant that Obama the pup will be bringing many changes to our lives.  

   My groom is completely enamored, and I am so excited that he has something to brighten up his days when work gets especially tiresome.  Brandon's a natural trainer and we have high hopes for our young son, although he's spoiled rotten already.  After the adoption was official we paraded into PetSmart and spent a small fortune getting everything our special boy could never need: specialty dental chews for his developing teeth, brain-stimulating toys, blueberry flavored snacks - you name it.  Needless to say, we were far more excited about his stuff than he was.  

  While Obama has proven to be quite the little love (all puppy kisses and happy scampering about), Brandon and I both underestimated how unpleasant potty training could be in 27 degree weather.  Every hour we bulk up in all our cold-weather gear, then drag poor Baby 'Bama out to freeze while he sits there looking at us like we're morons as we continuously chant, "Go potty!  You can do it!  Go potty!"  He has this uncanny skill to make us sit outside for fifteen minutes begging him to go, only to relieve himself the minute we give up and walk inside the door.  Lovely.  Thankfully, we live in an apartment with all the original fixtures when it was brand spankin' new in 1978, so the carpet has certainly seen rougher days.  Don't worry, we've got a date with a carpet cleaner as soon as he figures it all out.  

  Meanwhile, he has already mastered two commands that don't involve trying to guess the speed of his metabolism.  For some strange reason (I blame it on the fact that we are new parents), Brandon and I decided to teach Obama German, a language neither of us claim to know.  Thus, with the aid of pocket translators and my meager memory from German class in undergrad, we are using all German commands to train.  Whenever he hears "Achtung!" (attention), he already knows to stop what he's doing and look into our face.  I'm really excited he got that one so fast!  Next he has is "Setzen", which means sit.  He's gotten pretty good at that, although now whenever he hears "Achtung!" he immediately looks at us and sits. Could be worse.  We are quickly memorizing more German so we can continue training.  Now if we can just get him to pee outside...